Time for Despojo: Break Away from Your Generational Curses Now

Despojo BeLatina Latinx
Photo courtesy of clarin.com

Past generations hand us their torch. While there is an expectation to carry the traditions of a culture, some aspects of paying it forward don’t always serve us well. 

Latino culture is known for its close ties to ancestors. Plenty of us have been impacted by the generational curses (also known as family or hereditary curse) passed down from older generations. 

The practices, beliefs, and sins of elders have a progressive effect on the younger population. Unfortunately, wrongs committed by those that came before us somehow have a way of manifesting themselves in our modern lives in different ways.

Family histories are complicated, especially when adding the dynamics of different personalities and individual experiences. Frequently, the barrage of emotions that spur from misdeeds committed by family members goes stealth. Ultimately, this forces the baggage’s weight to have a far greater effect on our person, shaping us more than we realize. 

Whether we want to admit it or not, our lineage plays a role in our lives. The negative characteristics inherited from those that came before us can create a frequently onerous burden to shake off.

Although it may not necessarily be anything you’ve personally dealt with, some of these curses will sound familiar if you were raised in a Latino family. 

  • Recurring Immorality: We’ve heard the stories but rarely comment on them in public. The creepy uncle or grandfather acting inappropriately towards a family member. Generations living in silence about the well-known “secret,” which leads to the behavior or its effects perpetuating without consequence, sometimes decades.
  • Harmful Practices or Conduct: Over the years, addiction has become a significant poison for families wrestling with the problem. Drug and alcohol abuse has taken victims struggling with demons inherited from the family line. Divorce has also come for marriages, as individuals are convinced they are doomed to repeat the parents’ mistakes and evils. The patterns of behavior that lead to a failed marriage are adopted over and over until the cycle is broken by a realization that each person is responsible for their own actions within the relationship. Domestic violence is another example of how destructive behaviors can sneak into present generations, and imposed old-world attitudes like those of patriarchal societies lead to treating women in inferior ways.
  • Poor Mindset: Some people are raised in unhealthy environments filled with toxic strongholds that affect mental well being. We don’t necessarily understand the impact of the negative mindsets inherited until we acknowledge thought patterns as adults. Judgmental and perfectionist attitudes, for example, can be transferred from parents to children creating a world of unrealistic expectations affecting the ability to be objective about our failures. This all leads to incredible pressure to meet unattainable goals resulting in a state of “never good enough” affecting numerous aspects of our lives. 

Generational curses can get in the way of healthy thinking and living if we let it. Everyone has historical data, but it does not define you or how you will live. Taking the reins of your present life encourages breaking the cycle. Dismantling the hex is certainly possible, but it is entirely up to you to change your trajectory. 

My roots have been a struggle on and off during my life. Battling family curses of my own scared me into thinking. The process of evolving into the woman I am today consisted of understanding our own generational curses and learning to write my own story. It is a beautiful thing to wake up to the realization of choice. I am not bound by my ancestors’ mistakes and attitudes; my footprints are in direct contradiction of theirs. The freedom to disrupt the pattern is already in my hands, ensuring the buck stops with me. 

The time for a despojo is now, a cleansing of spiritual negativity, dumping of energies and experiences that do not serve you. Personally, it has been a process for me to physically release myself from my family’s past, not an easy task. It takes a fair amount of mental energy and willpower to let go of the things that hold one down. However, I found these actions helpful while working to rid myself of my own family curses. 

  1. Awareness: It’s crucial to recognize toxic patterns. Be honest with yourself when seeking answers. Challenges present themselves anytime we want to live in truth. Prepare yourself to dig deep. Ask yourself the questions to help you determine if there is an issue that needs to be analyzed. What are your biggest fears? Were you raised with both parents? Do you struggle with intimacy? Did you experience any type of abuse in your family history? Have you experienced a loss such as suicide, miscarriage, divorce? Do you have stable relationships and friendships in your life? Answers to your questions will assist you in connecting the dots.
  2. Decide: Once you find that generational issues affect you, decide to break the cycle. You have a say in how to lead in your life; patterns can be broken. As difficult as it may be, we can choose better for ourselves. In doing so, you will be the best you possible for yourself and those you love.
  3. Reclaim Your Power: The power you have is in the choices you make in life. The potential to overcome generational curses lies in your hands. Do not give in to the negativity or feed into the bad things that have taken place in your family’s lineage — part ways with anything that holds you back or takes away from your happiness. You control your actions, never underestimate the power of your will. Do not allow others to determine your destiny; it is on you to shape it.

Breaking away from family curses is painful. You accept a huge responsibility when taking a stand on a past that does not belong to you. Walk your path with your head held high, knowing that you are enough. We are not defined by others’ experiences, not even by our past. Allow yourself the opportunity to create your own footprint of what your life should be for you.